On being quite

There are times when not saying anything is the most powerful comment. Not always in that passive-aggressive ‘silent treatment’ sort-of way either. Just not adding to the noise.

There are many different reasons to be quite. To not pipe up and add your two cents. Sometimes it is to not say something you will regret later. Sometimes it is because you just don’t know what to say. Almost always, someone is waiting for you to say something.

That is the problem. That is when the silence is the loudest thing around. When the air that moves the sound is missing along with it. No one breaths. No one moves. Everything is as still as a grave. An ice-cold marble mausoleum of silence.

Then there are those times when you are just being quite. Have nothing to say. Have no reason to say anything. Just pondering a list or possibly working out the opening sentence to the next great American novel in your head.

That has its own problems that come along with it.  Mostly is it everyone stopping and asking you, “What’s wrong?” Ugh. Now, not only can you not continue with your book, now you have to say something. The worst thing you can do is say, “Oh, nothing.” This will bring about more and more questions until there is something wrong. It is you being really pissed off at hearing that question.

No matter what the situation is, being quite will not help. Speak up. Say something you know will be taken the wrong way. Say something you know will be taken exactly as you mean it. Cruel, cutting, belittling and permanent. For some reason, this is preferred to just holding your tongue, trying to avoid hurting anyone.

When, how did it come to pass that silence became such a bad thing? The sound bite society, always some thing making noise around us. Machines that make noise to block out noise.

Next time I might write about being alone. Some people don’t know how to do that either.

A V